We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
