is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize