worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
