U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
