I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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