i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
