If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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