Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I wish you could order shots online.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
