Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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