$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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