i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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