At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
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