My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
