ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
