You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize