ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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