great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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