She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
You don't make any sense
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