we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
