yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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