All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Randomize
