what if every blade of grass was a penis?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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