like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
