Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize