Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
