I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
