I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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