im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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