But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Did I show you my penis last night?
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
