Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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