I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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