Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
