But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Randomize
