I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
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