Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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