barbara walters just said penis...
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize
