it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
