Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Randomize