I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
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