He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
my liver is dry heaving
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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