Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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