he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
