i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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