It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
