Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
you would pick up someone in the library
false alarm. still invincible.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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