Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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