I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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