just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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