I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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