p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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